I was going through old photos taken with my phone around Corning. Over the past couple of years, I have spotted some odd signs around town:

Oddly Specific

FINALLY! Someone sticks it to the handicapped!
–Taken @ CMoG

Maybe it’s the graphic designer in me, but lack of bullet points throws me off

This always made me laugh; I imagined myself trying to purchase a gift certificate for a “Deep tissue hot stone pregnancy”.
–Taken outside Steuben Professional Massage Associates

 This Seems Illegal

I guess they still believe in the old “They can’t sue us for causing fires if we put a sign up” myth.
–I forget where I took this one (Sunoco on Denison?)

You’re Just Trying to Confuse me

No questions? No questions about what? You’re not going to question my fake ID? I’m not allowed to ask to see the bartender’s ID? BUT NOW I’VE GOT SO MANY QUESTIONS! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME!? 
–Taken @ Oaks Sports Bar

Did you expect delivery from a limo?

So that’s why Pudgies Pizza tastes so good!
–Taken on the road (352)

Ummm… I think I got the wrong order

Is this your f-ed up version of a fortune cookie?
–Taken @ Frills of NY (no longer in business)

My Brain Hurts…

I feel a breeze.. OH GOD NO!!! I MUST HAVE LEFT THE DOOR UNLOCKED AND SLIGHTLY AJAR! …. Oh thank goodness; it was wide open! I almost had a panic attack.
–Taken at my current place of employment

Curiouser and Curiouser…

Don’t worry, it’s just a piece of paper, not an actual window.
–Taken at my former place of employment

Myles Lasco

Myles started UrbanCorning.com and Facebook.com/UrbanCorning in 2008, and ran it until May of 2014. Myles moved to Tacoma, WA and his new website can be found at: www.tacomatose.com.